emotional whoring

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Yeh..risque titles, but the fact is, there is no other way to word it (atleast in my book). I’m just about completely dismayed with each time I see someone caught in this trap. The fact is ladies out there are becoming slave and subject to the idea of being an emotional whore.

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Emotional “Whore”? Brr??

“Whoa buddy, that’s a strong word there” Yeh I know.
See a person considered to be a whore usually gives them self sexually for money..yeh ok, so how does that connect in regards to emotions? An emotional whore, will give them self: all of their emotions, all of the fiber of their being to someone in exchange for feeling good, being needed and as well being sought after; be it through attention, be it through a fling-based/unhealthy relationship that leads no where. The fact is an emotional whore is willing to live in the “happy right now” even if it means to forsake the “happy thereafter”. An emotional whore always sells themselves short because they want to end up feeling needed/completed by what they think another person can provide. –I guess that’s how I can best describe it for now.

We now identified that about 85% women fall subject to the title. All be it, it started with wanting to feel needed, or maybe you wanted to be included in a group? Perhaps, that guy he came along with roses, said the right things at the right time and before you know it, you were all too emotionally attached. As women, we are very emotional creatures, some perhaps a little more than others. When we love, we tend to love “hard” as they say, and deeply.

An emotional attachment can be formed in any type of relationship. You can have the overly attached friend, the overly emotional girl-friend, or the one I’ll talk about today..the emotionally bruised lady.

Emotionally Bruised

See in life, you have the happy people..then you have the people learning to find happiness. The emotionally bruised falls somewhere in the abyss of both categories. One day ecstatic about life, the next deeply depressed.  Often, this person has trust issues due to past experiences. They love easy, maybe too easy..get hurt and then they shut down and shut out everyone for a time, till something promising comes along. Makes sense? Well here’s an example:

“Kimmy” has been battling with the idea of loving a man for a long time. Since she was young, she always seem to meet the jerks. Be it some were nice..they still ended being jerks or well just stupid. After a long “finding me” phase, Kimmy decided to open her heart up to love again. She keeps meeting these guys who appear great, but somehow all leave her broken with either their actions or their words. It’s become obvious, Kimmy is so eager to find love, she’s now willing to go through love abuse multiple times– the willingness to become so attached to someone who is wrong for you, just for the sake of a happy right-now.

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Know of any Kimmys?? I do. And honestly, it’s never worth it. It may seem worth it in the beginning, but in the long run, you are the only one who ends up hurt. Ladies, its always easy to fall prey to this, because we feel lonely, or we feel un-wanted, but the two things to always remember, you are worth more than mansions and rubies, and your heart is to be treasured. And if that weren’t all, God loves you endlessly, so while it may be hard to do, give that want and need for a right now happiness to God, so He can give to you a lifelong happiness in the end.

I’ll certainly be speaking more on this topic, just wanted to get a feel for what others are thinking. (p.s. my apologies if the word whore has offended anyone, however it’s what best describes the audacity of putting ourselves in a position as such, that is all.)

share with me: have you ever had a Kimmy like experience? or know anyone who’s been through or is going through it? advice/feedback below please

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Sasha-Shae Shaw is a Visual Artist who is passionate about Natural Hair and it's care, Art and it's various forms, the world of beauty and fashion and her love for design. Follow up on the Tumblr Gallery where you can share your own photos, and check out the design services and portfolio, for all your Graphic, Web Design and Photography or custom craft needs.   Keep in touch with me on twitter, my facebook or my youtube channel and my Google Plus page.

6 COMMENTS

    • Hmm,..you know. I think it’s safe to say, it happens to us more. Why? Men aren’t so emotional as women, yes they can become attached, but they don’t go out there most of the time seeking comfort through emotional connections like a woman does. Well atleast that’s what I’ve seen in all my years of life..the woman is the one trying find something, while the men are like..oh well..on to the next or oh well, whatevers I’m still good.

      I know it happens on both sides though, so it’s really interesting. I hope in the other upcoming follow up posts more people chime in, especially men too.

  1. I have a Kimmy and actually this is her name. I have prayed for and with her many years. I counsel her ,talk with and to her as well as listen to her. What has kept her in these emotional bruised situations is simply this”Loneliness”. She always feels its best to be with some Man or a Good Enough Man,or I’ll put up with this from this Man Just to have a Man In her Life. I constantly tell her she’s worth more than what she accepts. I have always told her to cherish herself as though she is Worth more than Gold and Diamonds, Keep herself up, in high integrity and moral character, with utmost respect in and for herself. i only pray that she will Wake up and Realize who she is and Stop the emotional Abuse.

    • I can only imagine how that could make you feel. It’s really tough seeing those we love suffer through emotional abuse, and worse when the abuse is self-inflicted. I too pray she and many others like her will see their worth, but not only that, see who Jesus created them to be, and come to accept His love. It’s the only love that fills that gap we all are looking for to be filled.

      I’ll be doing another follow up on this type of topic, because it’s definitely something we have to touch on for all people.

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